Everyone lives with that, suicide or not.Well if you go by the Bible - you go to hell. If you are an atheist, there is nothing after. But for the people you leave behind - their lives are definitely not better. Bad relationships, regret, heartache, remain. Nothing gets resolved for the living - and they have to live with the guilt - the what-ifs.
Death could be the red/blue pill situation or it could just be nothingness.
I've had a number of friends commit suicide and I don't judge them.