Girl Talk

[Y2K]

Do you think that it is inappropriate/creepy for a male staff member to greet an attractive female staff member when seeing them for the first time on any given day, or is it safer to pretend that they don't exist unless they notice and greet the male staff member? this is something I feel uncomfortable about.

Let me understand this correctly, you're asking if a male staff member greeting a female staff member for the first time is creepy?

If yes: No it's not creepy, unless the male staff member is going out of his way to greet her, in which case he is expecting to gain something other than a response then we start having a problem because this could lead to other issues like harrassment.

Tldr: He's either just being nice but if he's going out of his way then it could lead to issues.

 

[Y2K]

Um.....I don't know.
I was watching her vidz on TIkTok. Sometimes I see something, feel strongly about it in the moment, and share it around without being able to explain why I am doing what I am doing.

You can blame the lizard part of our brain for this, it's a very common trend, one of the reasons I don't use apps like tiktok, women tend to go viral for one of the two reasons.

1. They objectify themselves or allow men to objectify them.

2. A smaller percentage produces content that doesn't involve utilising their bodies to gain an audience, ie giving advice.

 

[Nicholas]

Let me understand this correctly, you're asking if a male staff member greeting a female staff member for the first time is creepy?

If yes: No it's not creepy, unless the male staff member is going out of his way to greet her, in which case he is expecting to gain something other than a response then we start having a problem because this could lead to other issues like harrassment.

Tldr: He's either just being nice but if he's going out of his way then it could lead to issues.

Not just on the day she joins the company, but a few times a week if I happen to walk past her and I think that am within her field of vision. If she has been friendly, I want to come across as being polite in return and no more than that. I am bad at interacting with other people, and would rather not unwittingly behave inappropriately.

 

[Nicholas]

You can blame the lizard part of our brain for this, it's a very common trend, one of the reasons I don't use apps like tiktok, women tend to go viral for one of the two reasons.

1. They objectify themselves or allow men to objectify them.

2. A smaller percentage produces content that doesn't involve utilising their bodies to gain an audience, ie giving advice.

I am finding it very difficult not to be infatuated with two characters in a series I am watching. I enjoy the series but seeing them is maddening.

 

[Y2K]

Not just on the day she joins the company, but a few times a week if I happen to walk past her and I think that am within her field of vision. If she has been friendly, I want to come across as being polite in return and no more than that. I am bad at interacting with other people, and would rather not unwittingly behave inappropriately.

So you're the male in question?

Well there's nothing wrong with greeting a female coworker, have a conversation just keep it professional, the best way to get better at something is to practice.

Things only become awkward when you change the way you view that person, you don't need to tell her she's attractive unless she asks.

 

[Y2K]

I am finding it very difficult not to be infatuated with two characters in a series I am watching. I enjoy the series but seeing them is maddening.

That's completely normal. People do it all the time.

 

[Nicholas]

So you're the male in question?

Well there's nothing wrong with greeting a female coworker, have a conversation even just keep it professional, the best way to get better at something is to practice.

Things only become awkward when you change the way you view that person, you don't need to tell her she's attractive unless she asks

I am.

 

[Tribs]

Do you think that it is inappropriate/creepy for a male staff member to greet an attractive female staff member when seeing them for the first time on any given day, or is it safer to pretend that they don't exist unless they notice and greet the male staff member? this is something I feel uncomfortable about.

No colleagues you can greet without being creepy. I actually find it weird if people don't greet. But do it once. Rest of your encounters, you can give a slight smile. Not a huge grin - just a friendly acknowledgment.

 

[Y2K]

No colleagues you can greet without being creepy. I actually find it weird if people don't greet. But do it once. Rest of your encounters, you can give a slight smile. Not a huge grin - just a friendly acknowledgment.

*Imagines huge grins when coworkers walk past.*

 

[Tribs]

Not just on the day she joins the company, but a few times a week if I happen to walk past her and I think that am within her field of vision. If she has been friendly, I want to come across as being polite in return and no more than that. I am bad at interacting with other people, and would rather not unwittingly behave inappropriately.

Think about it this way. If I worked for your company - would you greet me when you first see me on the day? Of course you would. It is no different.

 

[OCP]

Do you think that it is inappropriate/creepy for a male staff member to greet an attractive female staff member when seeing them for the first time on any given day, or is it safer to pretend that they don't exist unless they notice and greet the male staff member? this is something I feel uncomfortable about.

If you are keen on her definitely greet her.
But then greet everyone as to not be creepy.

If you are wanting to interact with her more - find out what interests she has, ask her how her day is going, tell her a joke or funny story.

Relationships take time to built up and some people only start opening up after getting to know the other person and once they feel safe.

She might very well be in a happy relationship and not keen to make work friends beyond a casual "hey how are you/etc" in which case don't take it personally.

 

[Nicholas]

Thanks