Home Stuff Satire Medical scheme pays a claim!

    Medical scheme pays a claim!

    By Linza de Jager

    The ‘Always there for you’ medical scheme admits that it, too, is fallible. CEO BA Rump guffawed as he told The Grotto that the medical scheme recently “actually paid a claim!”

    When asked how this happened Rump explained, “It was a slip up! Usually we have so many checks and hurdles and subclauses and hidden clauses in fine print in place that it can’t happen!”

    New employee processed the claim
    A new employee, one who is described as a “bit of an eager beaver, but never mind, he’ll get over it,” handled this claim, Rump says.

    The usual procedure would have been for him to send an automated response to the claimant. Should any further attempts at extracting payment be made, this procedure gets repeated.

    “It’s a tried and tested method,” Rump says. “Claimants weary when they get the same response over and over. They back off. I’ve been in the business for 40 golden years and I’ve seen it happen time and again. I tell the staff all the time: Don’t get involved. Just send an automated responses! They’ll get the message in the end.”

    A bitter pill but no hard feelings
    Rump says that no punitive steps were taken against the employee. He was however immediately informed of the correct procedure. “He’s a nice young fellow,” Rump comments. “He won’t do it again! He’s been teased terribly.”

    Linza de Jager is a journalist, poet and painter. She belongs to a medical scheme but she’s not saying which one. And no, she won’t be drawn out on the matter.


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